In a recent blog post, Stress By Association, I talked about gathering your energy back into your body. I alluded to this in a brief way, a general way, so let’s dive into this topic more deeply so that you have a breakdown of how to do that.
Let’s start with a few questions, questions that in and of themselves start to help you collect the energy that you are expending, and help you start to discern which areas of your life are draining you.
Do you find yourself getting enmeshed in the emotions of others?
If yes, whose emotions affect you the most? In answering this, we are not ‘blaming’ the person, just noticing and taking an inventory. How are the persons emotions, wants, expectations affecting you?
Which environments do you spend most of your time? Home, car, work, school, friends/ families houses, soccer field watching kids play soccer.
Think about these environments, and likely the people associated with these areas. Which places are feeling draining and consistently result in a feeling of overwhelm, a heavy feeling in the body, like you are weighed down.
Again, we are not creating an atmosphere of blame or judgment, but we ARE noticing the places that are most draining.
As you let your consciousness scan your experiences, notice how your body feels. Some of the energy will start to come back to the body. Allow the energy to fill you, to energize you.
Journal about the people and places that drain you and develop a list of people and places that you would like to gather your energy back from.
This is not ‘taking’ energy from them, it is reclaiming your energy in a loving, compassionate way. It is done with less, screw-you-I’m-taking-my-energy-back, and more, with-love-I-reclaim-my-energy.
Journalling might look like this:
“HOME – Home is feeling draining, I don’t have my own space, kids and hubby always want something from me, and I give it. I feel like I am giving and giving, and I don’t have anything left to give, yet I give more. And then when I think of self care, it overwhelms me and I just want to sit down and eat ice-cream. I want more energy, badly, but I’m feeling so drained by what everyone wants from me, and I still feel like I’m not doing enough anyway. But I’m ready to gather my energy back. I’m ready to reclaim my energy. I know I would feel better if I reclaimed some of the energy that is bleeding all over the place. I think I would feel like a better mom and wife, too, if I could have more energy. But I feel selfish wanting my energy back.”
A lot of us have been socialized to believe that giving to others is the way we show them we love them, it is the way that we show we are a worthy person, that we care.
Many think that to not give away their energy is somehow selfish. Sadly, this is a flawed belief. When we habitually give away our energy, we end up drained and we eat more and we feel disconnected from our bodies and our life.
Ironically, we feel more energized when we gather our energy back into the body, and this does not mean that we can’t support others, in fact, it means we have more energy to support others. The shift is that we are prioritizing ourselves AS WELL as others.
In Monday’s Alinga : Mindful Mojo Newsletter I’ll offer an audio guided meditation to gather your energy back and a written version on the blog next week.
Sign up for the newsletter at this link so you use the guided meditation to refill your energy tank.
If you are reading this at a later date, everyone who signs up for the newsletter receives the guided meditation! Yay! Time to improve your energy levels, feel happier and more productive to-boot!
PS> My newsletter is bi-monthly, and it includes a new guided meditation each time! More tools for the tool basket!!
PSS> Here is a Mindful Mojo guided meditation sampler!